Being a girl, I love to watch movies. I’m not picky about movies either. I’ll watch anything, but because I am a girl, I do like the ones that make me cry. This does not just include tragic movies. Oh no. I can cry over anything that moves me. There’s a baby involved? I’m done for. Cute pokemon almost dies three times? I’m a weeping wreck.
Even though I am most definitely a crier, and I can and will cry at anything that moves me, this really only happens when two lovers are being separated from each other either by any means. I really do love those movies like The Notebook and Sense and Sensibility, but while they provide wonderful crying opportunities for me, they are a bit unrealistic. From rain, to more rain, and even some more rain, movies like to make up silly ridiculous romantic scenes, and have ignorant girls like me believe that that would actually be a fun thing to do. Allow me to show you how.
1). Confessing undying devotion and love to each other in the rain.
You see this one in The Notebook, Pride and Prejudice (only Mr. Darcy’s confession, of course), and from many other tear jerking films. Even though this looks romantic and beautiful on screen, this one is a load of waffle. Have you ever stood out in the rain before? Without an umbrella? I have, and let me tell you that it was one of the most unpleasant days of my life. I was at the fair with a friend that decided he didn’t want to be there anymore and left me in the rain. My mother was told to come get me at a certain time and alas I had an hour to go before she was to come get me. I tried to stay out of the rain but there was nowhere to go without being pelted on. Eventually when my mother turns up, I look like a drowned rat, so even though movie rain is romantic, I would rather be listening to a heartfelt confession inside a dry place thank you very much. This goes along with kissing in the rain. Just a no thanks from me.
2). Falling back onto snow.
This one scene occurs in the most terrible and annoying movie Love Story. I pride myself on saying that I did NOT cry during this movie. It was the worst seventies acting I have ever seen. Anyway back to the moment. Main girl Jenny tells main guy Oliver that she loves him while they study. Scene cuts to Oliver standing outside with snow on his head and then suddenly he laughs and falls backward onto the snow. Jenny laughs and does the same thing. I was a bit curious about this one since we all have layed down in the snow to make a snow angel, so I tried it out on my own. I don’t know about you but falling backwards onto the snow is a sure way to get snow in your pants and shirt. Just sayin’.
3). Dancing romantically with someone you just met (and flying around on the bumble)
This one I fell for as a small child. Obviously I knew that I couldn’t fly around with a fairy on his pet bumblebee like Thumbelina, but I wanted someone that I didn’t know to come into my room and take me out for a dance and come back the next day baring gifts and proposing marriage. I’m amazed that we have all survived from the cartoons our parents allowed us to watch. I’m not hating on cartoons either. I know I will let my future children watch Thumbelina, I mean she’s the voice of Ariel for God’s sake.
4). Being held ransom in a castle by a Beast.
This one’s pretty self-explanatory. Really girls? Really? He’s not even good looking when he changes back into Prince form. I’d take captain Shang any day, but that’s probably because I have yellow fever.
5). Being stalked by a vampire.
I admit that when I read the book I was totally into Edward Cullen. I was so excited for the movie to come out that I went to the midnight showing with my good friend A, also know as muh woman. As I excitedly watched the sulky emo Edward try to curb his desire to suck Bella’s blood, I realized that this guy is the king of creepers. Watching her while she slept eh? At first it was cute when I imagined it, but upon seeing you standing in her bedroom watching her have a nightmare, yeah cute flew out the window. Sorry Twilight fans, but you are all in love with Creepy Creeperton on Creepyville. I’d rather spend a day with the boy who lived.
Whoever finds this attractive, well, I can only shake my head at you.
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